Original Folklore

I have created this fairy tale to accompany my novel which is still in the works. In the book, a bed time story is passed down through the generations as a prophesy of something to come. Through thousands of years, some abandon the story and fail to tell their children, leaving some confusion when it does come to pass. The moral of the story is, when the special children are made known, every person will take on the roll of one of the characters in the story.

Please let me know where my holes are, how I can make this sound more “folklore-y”. TIA

Once upon a time, there were four brothers who lived in the middle of the woods by themselves. Their parents were old and passed when the youngest boy was a baby, leaving the oldest brother to care for the other three and to tell stories about their parents so they would remember.

The middle brothers were twins. One twin was loud, jealous, and often blamed the youngest for their parents passing, even though it was not his fault. The other twin would simply agree with everything the other said and did. They hated the younger brother and were very mean to him despite the older brother punishing them for how they treated the youngest.

One day while the youngest brother was hiding from the twins, he discovered a great talent. The talent was so special that none of his brothers could do it even if they tried. So special that it was almost like magic. The magic helped the big brother not have to work as hard and the twins could have everything they ever needed.

But the twins were not thankful. Their little brother’s talent made them hate him more so they ran away. They did not get far down the road, when a carriage approached. It was driven by a very large man in a dark hat with a mustache and beard. In the carriage were many children with a sign on the side that said “Special Children Wanted”.

“Hey, Mister! What sort of special children are you looking for?” Shouted the loud twin.

The man saw the two boys that looked identical and stopped the carriage. He grinned a sparkling grin and nicely replied, “The kind with a talent so special that no one else can do it even if they tried. So special that it is almost like magic.”

“How much will you pay for a Special Child?” The grin fell from the man’s face when he realized the twins were not special children. But he thought for a few moments and his smile returned.

“Bring me this special child and let me see for myself. Then I will decide what it is worth to me. What if he is not special at all and you are just a couple of naughty boys trying to get rid of a pesky brother?” What the carriage driver did not tell the twins was why he was collecting the special children. You see, the driver thought that maybe if he collected all the special children he could cook them and eat them, then he would get all of their special powers.

“Oh you’ll see, Mister! He’s special alright. We will go home right now and get him.”

The man was so excited that he followed the twins to their home, but the big brother was home and the twins knew he would not stand for it.

The big brother stood outside of the front door with the special brother behind him.

“Can I help you, Mister?” asked the big brother, firmly even though the man from the carriage was bigger than him.

“I am here for your special brother. These boys have sold him to me and now he is mine.”

The big brother was angered at the twins but stood his ground. “He is not for sale. Now you will leave me and my brothers alone.”

The man from the carriage did not like this answer one bit and took all four of the brothers and threw them into the back of the carriage with the other special children.

The youngest brother could not help but feel like the situation was entirely his fault. If he was not so special, his brothers would not hate him so. He knew he needed to save his brothers so he began to talk to the other special children and convinced them to all use their special talent at the same time to stop the carriage, open the lock, and run away.

Their plan worked. The brothers and all the special children ran away to the brothers’ home in the woods. The man from the carriage chased them the whole way but once they got to the house, they used their talents to keep the man out.

The twins timidly thanked the youngest brother for saving them and apologized for trying to sell him. But the big brother would not let them go unpunished. He made them servants to the special children to teach them humility.

And there they all lived happily ever after.

 

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10 thoughts on “Original Folklore

  1. Interesting story, like Pinnochio meets Hanzel & Gretel and Joseph and the coat of many colors. Names would help the reader keep track of the characters. Also, you’re switching point of view. How do we know what the the carriage driver is going to do with the children? What is the special power? Aren’t all of God’s children “special” in some way?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This was really great! You definitely have the knack for folk stories, this tale fit that genre really well. I’m intrigued to know what the special power is. I also really liked that ending, how the brothers have to pay for their crimes by serving others, it’s a great message. Keep up the great work!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s explained in the book how no one ever knew what the special power was. So when the prophesy actually came to fruition, it was alien to most people sending the main character into a journey of self discovery. Thanks for the feedback!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Awww .. thank you my friend. I love story lines like this. I can’t wait to read in its entirety! 🙂

        Like

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